abernat

 Okay... this one I like. First, a better name. Second, a better shave. What's not to like? 

I must admit I went into this slightly biased by other reviews I've read - this is a very popular blade. Given that, I decided to toss the Dorco early (I've been trying to give blades a week) and go with the new one. It helped that I was in a hurry...

Short review: a very close shave and no cuts. I'm not sure that it's Feather-close (I'll see how long I stay smooth) but I definitely got the wifely seal of approval. 

What's in a name? Dorks, obviously. 

The Dorco is the fourth blade I've tried. I'm giving this an early review because, well... they suck. 

The good news is that you can't cut yourself with this blade. The bad news is that's because they're very dull. I had to work about twice as long getting smooth this morning as I normally do, and my cheeks were still scratchy after that. It might work well as a training blade (or for J to use on her legs... hmm) but this is not going to be preferred as a shaver. 

I'll update this post when I find how long the blade lasts.

 This is actually the third blade I've tried, but the first where I started keeping notes. Hence the misordering. 

The Crystal blades come in a small plastic package much like other razor blades. They're not labelled Crystal anywhere I can see; instead, there is a blue label that says "made in Israel". Okay, then. 

I found that this blade shaved much like a 1-2 day old Mach 3. That's both good and bad; it didn't give me the baby-butt-smooth shave of a Feather, and I started getting scratchy about 5pm. By the next day I was definitely back in shave territory.

As a side note: scratchiness is relative to my extremely soft beard and so is probably underestimating most men. 

On the other hand, it was basically impossible to cut myself with this blade. I tried a very heavy stroke and after a week have one tiny slice (~1/32") on the edge of my jaw. 

Blade lasted a week before I started to feel pulling rather than cutting, so they last pretty long as well.

Having tried the Merkurs, Feathers, these, and DORCOs (lol), they will probably be my go-too blade unless something else is much better. I like the closeness of a Feather but really appreciate the lack of bleeding.

 One of the things that surprised me about going to a safety razor is that not all razor blades are created equal. Also, sharper does not equal better; there is a wide range of sharpness, blade angle, metallurgy...

In short, the advice commonly given is to buy what is called a "blade sampler" and give them a whirl. And so I am, and I'm going to put reviews up here for those who might find it interesting. Also, because J wants to comment as well. 

I bought a package of Merkur brand blades at Community Pharmacy (with my razor), and the Extended Sampler from West Coast Shaving. The sampler also included a pack of Merkurs, so that leaves me with the following unique blades:

• Merkur Super Platinum
• Feather New Hi-Stainless Platinum
• Crystal or "Israeli"
• Derby Extra
• Gillette Platinum
• BIC Chrome Platinum
• DORCO Platinum
• Red Pack Israeli

As a side note, that's about 60 blades for ~25 dollars shipped. Nice.

A brief note on technique. 

A razor is, in effect, a line. Possibly several parallel lines forming a plane, but when you get down to it, a line. We also, for simplicity, approximate a face and neck as a cube. 

Yeah, right. 

Your face is not a cube. It's a collection of compound curved surfaces. To make matters worse, beards have a distinct grain - a direction the hairs lie - and the grain isn't constant at all. For example, on my neck the grain tends to run right to left, except for a patch the size of a quarter about halfway along. And I'm probably relatively normal. 

So good luck running your line over your collection of curves. 

There are better shavers than me out there (quite a few of them, in fact) and they all recommend the same thing: multiple passes and short, light strokes. I follow that advice to a greater and lesser extent, but again - I've got an easy case. My "beard" (such as it is) is pretty light and not very wiry. Some others who shall remain nameless (*cough* *cough* B... *cough*) apparently have facial hair that could serve as a wire bristle brush. 

So, the recommendation from the professionals:

Three passes per area. First with the grain to get most of the hair off, then across the grain (at 90 degrees) to get closer, and finally against the grain for that "smooth shave" that women seem to be so attracted to (as a note: they're not, but I can keep dreaming). Short strokes of about an inch to minimize the chances of nicking. 

I almost hold to this. There are certain areas (sideburns, for example) that get away with a single pass. My chin, especially the underside, gets three or four. I end up doing a sort of rough shave then using my hand to find patches I missed. Flat bits (sideburns, neck, etc.) get a single sweep; curvy parts get short strokes. 

Lastly, and possibly most important: keep your face wet as possible at all times. You should have a brush that is pretty well lathered, so use it. Dry shaving is... uncomfortable. I tend to splash my face wet, then apply lather - and take your time, you owe it to yourself. Lather up, do one set of passes with the razor (rinsing as appropriate, of course). Then check for missed spots, splash your face again, and lather again. When I've gotten impatient and said "eh, I don't need to brush my face more"... there go the nicks. And cuts. And slices. And OH MY GOD THE BLOO... just kidding. Mostly just nicks. 

Oh, and when I'm done, I put on some facial moisturizer. I've found that the razor manages to take a lot of the surface oils off, and besides - winter in WIsconsin. I'll take anything I can get. 

A word about bleeding. You will. It depends on the razor blade (yes, there are different types - I'll get to that tomorrow or sometime), but chances are you'll nick yourself. I don't worry about it any more. The small cuts seal over nicely with the moisturizer and bigger ones get handled with a dab of toilet paper. Besides, with a sharp blade, they don't hurt anyway.

Despite what the modern manufacturers of canned shaving cream would have you believe, preparing to shave should be a gradual process of nigh-courting behavior. The result will be a closer and more comfortable shave, as well as an enjoyable daily ritual. 

You begin with the hot shower. Now, in Wisconsin in the winter a "hot shower" is an end into itself; it may be the only time you are warm all day. So be it. Enjoy your shower; allow your pores to soak in the billows of steam. This serves both to open the pores as well as give you a reason for running the hot water heater dry. If you have a tankless heater, well... do your best to run it out of hot water. 

I continue by using a fine facial cleanser. I have started to use a soap that includes tea tree oil; the goal is not so much to strip your face of any oils that may have collected as to cleanse it of dirt while leaving a layer of moisture. A dry, cracked face will give an uncomfortable shave; a moist, clean face is vastly preferred. 

Then take your bowl (or mug), shave cream (or cake), and brush...

What? You don't own these items? Fear not, and allow me to explain. 

The purpose of the shave cream is to hold a layer of moisture (the classic dihydrogen monoxide, or "tap water") near your face. This provides a lubricating layer for the blade to slice along (rather than into), while simultaneously softening your whiskers. This layer is created with three items: the bowl (mug), cream (cake), and brush. 

The bowl. It provides a gently sloping surface in which to work. However, for the modern medicine cabinet, there is another solution: the mug. It provides a no-so-gently sloping surface which does a pretty good job of containing the shave cream and preventing it from exiting to distant vistas: the mirror, the sink, the floor. 

The cream or cake. Shun those cans of spray topping, and seek instead a fine shave cream, or, as I use, a cake of shaving soap. Mine lives in the bottom of my mug; if you use a cream you should probably make use of a bowl instead. 

The brush. This is the device which will serve to incorporate dihydrogen monoxide into the shaving cream. A brush of purest badger is preferred, not least because it is appropriate to a Wisconsin dweller. Mine is boar bristle which serves adequately. Artificial substances simply will not do. 

First, fill the sink with hot water. I do this while washing my face. Second, soak your brush until the bristles are saturated. Remove the brush from the hot water, and resist the urge to flick it dry; instead, allow it to drip. You wish to keep as much liquid as possible held in suspension. Take your brush to your mug and gently swirl the bristles in the cake, forming a rich lather. 

It is now time to lather your face. Swirl the brush over your face and neck, building an even layer of rich cream. This process should be repeated every time you apply blade to skin; it is an necessary (and fortunately, enjoyable) part of the process. 

You are now ready to begin shaving. We will continue with my blade impressions, for Jenn to poke fun at. 

First (from my perspective) there was the Gillette Sensor. Mailed free to every male of age (or so I remember), this little two-blade razor did a pretty good job of scraping the growth from my chin. Truth be told, it didn't have a lot of work to do. But hey.

Then, in college, there was the Gillette Mach 3. A third blade (and a moisturizing strip!). It certainly seemed to give that holy of holies, grail of grails, the "closer shave". And I (and more importantly, Jenn) was pretty happy with the whole thing.

And then there were 4 and 5 blade razors, but those got silly. After all, they crossed the line that existed only in my head, that three blades was okay, but more than that was verboten.

And so the Mach 3 did its daily duty of keeping my face smooth so that my wife would deign to be near me. And day followed day, week after week, year mounted on year. Until I realized that those little cartridges of three-blade-and-a-moisturizing-strip were actually pretty pricey for what you got. Now, they weren't anywhere (say) CPU expensive, or (worse) ink jet printer cartridges, but still.

And so I started using the same cartridge longer, and longer, and longer. And the shaves got worse and worse, but so gradually that Jenn didn't really notice.

The razor, of course, is accompanied by the shaving cream. And as with the Mach 3, I was seduced by the promise of technology, that cream that came in a can (with a spray tip!). But to tell the end of the story first, I soon switched my alliance to the classic brush-and-shave-soap combination. In truth, that is a story for a later day (short version: holy cow GUYS SWITCH 'CAUSE THE SPRAY CAN SUCKS!). But it directed my first uncertain steps down that most rickety of paths: classic shaving.

I'm not talking about a straight razor, of course. I'm not crazy or anything.

For Christmas/Hannukah/you-get-the-idea Jenn bought me a classic safety razor. You know, the kind that takes the little double-sided razors that then go in the slot in the back of the medicine cabinet and fill up the bathroom wall. In particular, we decided on the Merkur HD ( for one example). And we purchased along with it a little packet of Merkur brand blades.

And the shave was better than my month-old Mach 3. In fact, it was better than a new Mach 3.

And new vistas opened to my smooth-faced gaze. With Gillette you have the never-ending search for more three-blades-and-a-moisturizing-strip cartridges; but you have little choice. In fact, you have a strictly numeric choice: 2, 3, 4, or 5. Possibly 6. With a safety razor, you have an endless variety of razor blades to choose from. I began my quest with Merkur brand, but since found a number of merchants who would sell you packets of blades from metallurgists all over the world. And so I start a new thread: my adventures in shaving.

Next up: Feather blades from Japan.

And man am I tired.

Friday night we went to the Jonathan Coulton concert, with Paul and Storm leading off. Let's see...

1) I was the on the more "normal" end of the bell curve. Well off one standard deviation, and even using stats language won't push me towards the mean. Fun times.

2) Any group that opens with "We're the Opening Band"? Awesome. I had heard them before on the radio (Bob and Tom) but never realized quite how hilarious they were. I particularly recommend Nun Fight. Look it up.

3) Jonathan Coulton is probably best known for his recent work on Valve's Portal - which was a _great_ break for him - but his songs are excellent. The singer/songwriter hadn't disappeared, they only stayed niche - and geekdom is Coulton's niche. Look him up on Youtube, all you-who-never-heard-of-him. You know who you are - you're the ones scratching your heads.

And then there was Saturday. Saturday was farmer's market, then errands, then ribs. Mmm ribs. We made the farmer's market okay - a little rain, but not bad - and then took care of the errands. And then it was on to ribs.

There is something viscerally satisfying about smearing a piece of cooked meat covered with sauce all over your face. Eating ribs is messy - but it's an aesthetic mess. Snap poll: when I say "ribs", what animal do you think of? Cows? Good.

We'll have to do that again. Luckily, I just had lunch (Ian's Pizza) or I would be hungry.

Sunday was gardening. I'll let Jenn do most of the description, but suffice to say we 1) moved a lot of dirt from point A to point B and 2) put living organic creatures in the holes left at A. Our neighbor cut down an arborvitae hedge which really opened up part of our yard, and so I shifted our raised bed over. This involved digging out sod (ugh, heavy) and clay soil (ugh, heavy) and moving it to a third location.

But we now have blackberries. If only they'll start producing. Now.

I rode my bike to work almost every day over this past winter, until it got ridiculously icy and dangerous.

Salt + road grime + chain lube + bike = nasty black mess. Film at 11.

In previous years I've handed my bike off to the folks at Budget Bikes and had them deal with it. This year we have four bikes: my commuter beater, my nice bike for riding trails, Jenn's and Jaime's... possibly Hao's. Call it four and a half.

It's suddenly worth it to get a bunch of bike tools and do it myself. Hilarity ensues.

First hilarity: I purchased a set from REI (dividend! Go!). They came in a toolbox, but were unlabelled. Cut to Jenn reading "You need to use the bottom right-handed sprocket gear widget", and me looking at a bunch of almost-like-a-wrench-but-different things and going "Errr... okay?".

Side note: there are a fundamentally small number of different types of tools. Wrenches, which are "a thing to grab the object" and "a lever to to move it with"; pullers, which is "a plunger on a screw thread designed to push two things apart"; you get the idea.

Second hilarity: people watching me take my (commuter) bike apart. Especially when the rear axle came out... in two pieces. Err... I guess I broke an axle at some point; I wonder if that's why my bike was going thumpa-thumpa-thumpa.

Third hilarity: the sheer amount of _crud_ on the parts. I dumped everything into a bucket and liberally added industrial-strength degreaser. Then I did it again. And then again.

Now I'm working on putting things back together. I figure that it's a win-win situation - either I make it into work on time tomorrow, thus proving that I can strip a bike; or it breaks down, and I get to miss the videoconference that's at 9:30am.

There is something very viscerally satisfying about fixing a gasoline engine. It's right up there with lighting a bonfire with a match and, well, several gallons of gasoline. With a small amount of oil mixed in.

Let me step back a few hours.

If you hadn't heard already, it's snowy outside in Wisconsin. Snowy as in "over a foot since this morning". I felt that discretion was the better part of valor and stayed home, rather than spend an hour walking each way to get to work.

Ahh, the Internet.

This meant that I was also He Who Would Clear The Snow. Now normally this job would suck, but since we instead purchased a power tool, it blew.

Mmmm snowblowers. Wonderful little two-stroke engines, gasoline reek, and snow going elsewhere.

So I was there clearing our driveway from the (at that time) about five inches of snow. At the end of the driveway is a dip where it goes down to the road. I get the blower down there and it dies.

WTF???

Try to start, fail, try to start... fail. The hell.

So I lose man points and call Gene, the Shenandoah Apartments maintenance guy. He was the one that fixed the snowblower in the first place. My thought pattern here was something like so:

1) We bought the snowblower.
2) We put gas in the snowblower.
3) It didn't work.
4) Gene fixed it, gassed it up, brought it over.
5) I used the gas, put more in, and...
6) Shortly after I start using it, it doesn't work.

Gene told me that 1) I was worrying too much and 2) I probably just flooded the engine. Now flooding I know what to do about. Hell, I used to drive an '87 Landcruiser. So I let it sit, went inside, and... err... worked. Mmm Mass Effect.

That afternoon, went back out, started right up. So I kept clearing snow, until once again the dip faced me. Proving that I could in fact _not_ learn my lesson, I head down in there... and it dies.

Righto. Don't flood it, try to start it. Pull... and the FREAKING starter cord comes out.

Now, if I was anyone else, I would have stomped my feet and given up. Called a repairman and lost more man points.

HELL NO.

I'm a smart guy. I survived Harvey Mudd. I'm a woodworker that can fix up a house and run electrical wiring. Right?

Right.

So I head out to my garage and start stripping the thing down. Half an hour later, I'm down to the engine and the starter. The gas tank is hanging by a rubber line, bolts are neatly sorted, and wrenches scattered around. The starter cord goes into the starter, around a pulley, and into a little hole. I had managed to pull the knot out of the hole - hence, no start-ee.

Poke the cord in, re-tie it (figure-8 knot this time), and start putting it back together. I manage to donate only a little blood to the cause, and...

VROOM.

Hell yeah. I made fire.



... until I got to the dip. Then I busted out the shovel.

Holy cow is it cold outside. But you knew that.

Yesterday I taught my first class in... oh, a long time. My adviser is out of town (Israel, gee shucks) and he asked me to take over his undergrad OS class for the week. Two lectures and a discussion section.

And man oh man was it fun. I forgot how fun it is to take abstract concepts and make them real for people. To be able to say "this is why we care about these things - because they're out there, making a difference, _every day_."

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From the movie Hunt for Red October:

"Could you launch an ICBM horizontally?"

"Sure. Why would you want to?"

All to often we (as scientists and engineers) say the first part of that second sentence - "Sure" - without asking the second.

Fallout 2. One of the best games of all time. And now it just got better:

http://www.nma-fallout.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=40443

Lookit that. A huge expansion to the wonderful wasteland that is post-nuclear California. And now I have to go play it again. Which means getting my hands on a Windows machine, because the Mac patch... isn't there.

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Sigh. So Jenn tells me I should be more communicative. ;)

I use a Mac. Okay, so I'm in some 1% of the population. And I use the OmniWeb web browser, so now I'm in 1% of the 1%. And Jenn says "Just use the rich text editor for your posts", and I say "Wha?".

Turns out that Livejournal is doing something Firefox-specific; neither OmniWeb or Safari get the RT editor for posts. Which is interesting, because they are both standards-compliant (heck, OW is based on the Safari renderer).

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